But January ended and we made it out. We feel better than we have felt in many months. We are by no means over what happened, but we are not as lost as we once were. Life is moving forward and we are actually moving with it.
Next week I'll run the Myrtle Beach Marathon. This will be my first race since the Cherry Blossom 10-miler last April. So almost a year ago. When I think about everything that has happened since last April, it makes my head spin. That seems like a lifetime ago and I feel like I've aged 20 years in less than one.
But I am really looking forward to this race. It's the first one in a very busy race-filled period. The marathon is Saturday the 13th, there's a bike ride the next day that we're doing. Then my 50K, the big one, is March 6th. I'm running National Marathon on March 20th. Then the new 13.1 series race in New York on April 3rd, Cherry Blossom on the 11th and then the American Odyssey Relay on April 24-25.
I signed up for all of these races to give me something to focus on and as a way to deal with my grief. I needed to have something for myself that I could pour myself into and for me, that's running. I got past the very emotional block I was having when I started running again and I am having fun now. There's no pressure to run in a certain time, these races are for pure fun. John and I are actually running a couple together, which we haven't done since before we had Keller.
So allow me for a moment to pat myself on the back. I am proud of myself for making it to the other side. I could have taken so many different roads after losing the baby. And I was headed down a pretty dark one. But I didn't. I chose not to. And I'm glad I did.